August 5, 2009

The evolution of me

"Then, without realizing it, you try to improve yourself at the start of each new day; of course, you achieve quite a lot in the course of time. Anyone can do this, it costs nothing and is certainly very helpful. Whoever doesn't know it must learn and find by experience that a quiet conscience makes one strong."
-- Anne Frank

I've written several posts about how I have changed in the past couple of years, and how I still have many areas in need of improvement. I don't think I'll ever be "done" evolving, but every once in a while I need to stop and pat myself on the back. I'm pretty proud of the person I am today.

In fact, today was a perfect example of my accomplishments. We had a play date with two other homeschooling moms. One of the moms I hadn't seen in over two years. The person I was at that time is no where near who I am today, but I felt completely comfortable being the new "me". When we got out of the van, I had a small feeling of apprehension that I would feel the old emotions of anger and resentment. I also worried that I wouldn't be able to be sociable; that I might instead be sullen. After walking in and getting the kids settled, I never thought of it again. Everything I said and did was natural, and I had no fear of being judged. It wasn't until after we left that I remembered how I had worried a little.
I am reminded every day of how much I still need to work on, but I need to remember how far I've come too.

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