January 23, 2010

Mind full of Eyre

“You don't have to be a rocket scientist to learn this stuff, and it's not like you have to change your belief systems.”
-Jon Kabat-Zinn

It was 11p.m. and Robotson came out into the living room (again) to complain about the blinking light on the printer.  He's sleeping in the spare room right now, and he said it scared him last night.  I told him to turn it off.  He said he'd tried, but it wouldn't turn off.  I told him to put paper in the printer and push the button.  It was only blinking because it had a job to do.  So he goes off to try that, but comes back to say it didn't work.  Exasperated now, I go in there and push the button.  Voila!  It prints.  He grumbles about how it only works for me, and I go back to watching Alias on my laptop.

In October, I checked out Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting from our library system.  I let it sit around until I ran out of renewals, then I went up the library and begged them to let me recheck it out again.  I read maybe three chapters and finally turned it in.  The problem was I couldn't read it without feeling overcome with emotion.  Every time I picked up the book, I cried.

"There are times when we feel that things are basically sound in our family.  Our children seem happy, strong, and balanced.  The very next day, or moment, all hell can break loose.  Our world fills with confusions, despair, anger, frustration.  What we thought we understood is of no use.  All the rules seem to have changed overnight, or in an instant.  We can feel like we have no idea what is going on or why.  We can feel like the biggest of failures, like we don't know or understand anything."

Those sentences move me.  I've never read anything in any of my other books that explained so perfectly how I feel sometimes.  I ended up buying it because I knew I had to read it.

But I've been reading Jane Eyre.  Before Christmas, I noticed a book by Jasper Fforde on my shelf called The Eyre Affair.  I'm not even sure how I got it, but it looks really interesting.  I figured I'd read Jane Eyre first though since it's a big part of the story.  I'm usually a pretty fast reader, especially when the story is good, but I've been dragging it out.   Procrastinating, really.  I should be reading my books on mindfulness.

There were so many reasons for me to be annoyed with Robotson last night, but I went back in there and sat down.  We didn't discuss the printer, or anything of importance really, but we both needed to be present for just a few minutes together.  All of a sudden, he was sleepy and I tucked him in.

We've all been sick and grumpy this week.  I wonder how much easier it would be if I could just stay in the moment.  I think it's time to finish Jane Eyre.

6 comments:

  1. Hey cuz! I went to an atheist meeting last night in stl and met awesome people!! thought of you and referred a mom to your blog in case she was interested. Love ya!

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  2. Fun! Thanks for the props :) Love you more!

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  3. Jane Eyre is on my reading list for this year too. I'll have to get through Sense and Sensibility and the other 2 novels sitting on my nightstand quickly, then maybe I can actually read it and get to talk to you about it! I miss being in a book club sometimes.

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  4. The idea of a book club is always so much more fun than actually being in one, for me that is. I have issues with feeling like I *have* to do something and that's sort of the point right? Having to read the book so that I can talk about it LOL. That say, I do sort of miss having people to talk with about the things I was reading.

    S&S was my least favorite Austen book, you can skip it....kidding!! What are the other two?

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  5. The other two books I'm reading now are The White Queen by Phillipa Gregory and Along Came a Stranger by, um, not sure who. I was on the waiting list for the Phillipa Gregory book for about two months now, so of course my turn came up when I was having a busy week. I better get reading! I love historical fiction.

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  6. Oh I've heard Phillipa Gregory is really great. I want to know all about the book when you are done!

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