February 21, 2011

Mindful Monday: Ending the Blame Game

Last night before I went to sleep I challenged myself to find only positive perspectives on Monday.  If I couldn't think of anything good to say, I was just going to keep quiet.  Oh how many times did I hear that as a child?  It's a hard lesson to learn though.

I can't remember every moment of the day now, but I know I was pretty spot on all morning and into the afternoon.  There were a few slip-ups in the evening, but I think I accomplished what I wanted; just be more aware of the things that I say.  Interestingly, as I was saying less - I heard more.  Much of what I heard was exactly the sort of stuff I was avoiding myself.  There were a lot of "you" statements and major drama over small issues.  Clearly this is something that I need to change in myself, but it's just as important that I model it for the rest of the family.

I know thinking before you speak is common sense.  I also know that not everything can or should be glossed over.  But 99% of the time whatever is going on is just not worth that much energy, especially if it's negative.  Ten minutes later, the next day, in 20 years - most of it won't matter.  I'd rather spend my time looking for solutions, not sweating the small stuff, and being benignly neglectful.

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