March 2, 2011

Secular Thursday: We don't go to church.

Our homeschool group went to see Symphony Street yesterday.  At lunch, one of my friends told us the story of a conversation she'd had with another homeschooler before the show.  The lady kept asking if we were part of a church group, or if we'd all met at church.  My friend is entirely too polite to inform her that our group is secular in nature.  The woman persisted though, and finally my friend told her she didn't go to a church.  She said the woman didn't say anything else to her after that.

I've been very fortunate in this area; I can't remember the last time someone asked me about church.   When we were first starting out, I do remember meeting with one woman a couple of times who was clearly very religious.  She never directly asked me any questions, but I think she always expected me to jump in with details that I just didn't have.  Strangely, I saw her and her children at the symphony yesterday.  At one point we were sitting in the same row, and I tripped over her while taking Dimples to the bathroom....oops!  Anyway, eventually we met all the amazing families that we know now - so it never comes up.

I know it's a common homeschooler's complaint that people assume everyone homeschools for the same reasons.  I suppose the church question is no more annoying than "Which curriculum are you using?"  I get that one much more frequently too.  Both are sort of presumptuous, but perhaps they come from a place of curiosity- not judgment.  Well, at least until they hear the answer.

As for the symphony, the show was brilliant.  You can see the kids were engaged and it was more than just music.  Check out the link above if you want to catch one of their upcoming shows.  It's well worth it.

Also see the other Secular Thursday bloggers here!
Flight of the bumblebee

The Mitten


  1. Your pix turned out so much better than mine! And your "secular moment" could not have been nearly as heart-stopping as when William asked the ASO dancer, "fluffing" the crowd before the performance, if HE was God. Bless him, his response was a non-committal "what a philosophical question!", with a big grin on his face.

    A close second was Michael asking what the big "plus sign" was, and my faltering explanation about the whole crucifiction thing (trying not to be too graphic). And then his prompt follow-up question about why there was a door behind the big cross, and how we could possibly access said door to said cross (for purposes I did NOT inquire into). Oh, my!

    It was a great event, and would do it again in a heartbeat! The orchestra, and everyone involved, was FABULOUS! William insisted on congratulating everyone involved in the production, and got to handle the big yellow mitten! How cool is that? :)

  2. Literally LOL'd, Mo! Once, at a funeral service (the girls' first time in a church), Ava asked if the man giving the eulogy was telling a story. "Kind of," I said. After a brief pause she asked, "When do we clap?"

  3. LOL, I witnessed William's question in action and sooOOO was saying "You're right, am him. Why do you ask?" in my head. (SLC Punk) Ah, the joys of secular homeschooling in the south - even the private events are in churches!

  4. Its not that I'm too polite, its that I don't want to get into my personal life with a stranger. I think those kinds of questions are very personal and kind of rude - like asking how much you weigh or how old you are. I know many people don't see it that way and take every opportunity to espouse their religious views; in fact, I know that is a key component of some religions. (Anyway, you know I'm not that polite! LOL!).

    I'm just glad everyone enjoyed the symphony as much as we did.

  5. Grace, but that's my point - you are too polite to answer what you consider a rude query. I'm not sure I think the church/religion questions are matters of etiquette, but B totally agrees with you. Actually, the thing about etiquette is that some of it is regional, though it's debatable that should be the case. Either way, I think you were very polite :)

    Mo- LOL your kids crack me up! Those are great questions. Good starters for future conversations.